Creativity

Haaa, six years later and I’ve completely forgotten that I even had a WordPress account.  It’s funny how things change.  Now I’m in college, trying to get my bachelor’s in Civil Engineering.  I haven’t written a short story in a long time, though all of my old stories and story ideas are still saved on my computer.  Recently, I haven’t been painting either, though that’s a hobby I picked up about four years ago.  I have my art easel and canvases laying around in my dorm room, but most of my time has been dedicated to school and lazing around (mainly the latter, though).  However, I think my career goals haven’t changed that much.  Even though it’s more math, engineering also requires creativity.  Innovation and improvements require an open mind, whether it’s for buildings, bridges, or highways.  Despite the gloomy me, I’m looking forward to a creative and fun-filled future.

And geez, how much my grammar from previous posts really bothers me now.

Classes

School started for me on September 4th.  All has been rather well.  I like most of my classes, some more interesting then others, some more difficult then others.  I’ve no real complaints besides the fact that I could have done better.   I’m in Algebra II and Biology College prep.  Those are pretty good classes aren’t they?  However, it’s possible that I move to Trignometry and Biology Honors.  For some reason, I don’t find the need to, though.  It’s strange to think about.  I sometimes feel unstatisfied with my decisions, yet I feel comfortable.  My mother accuses me of being afraid to change classes.  It’s possible for that to be the case, to be subconciously afraid to go up to a counselor and ask for a schedule change.
One of my classes, though, is slowly eating at me, Health.  It’s important and all, but I begin to regret not choosing the other class option, MUN (Models United Nation).  It was between Health/Futures or MUN and I chose Health in the end.  I admit, I was scared to try MUN.  I’m not a very sociable person, often stumbling over my words, debating is also not within my specialties.  My fear of embarassment drove me away from the choice of taking MUN.  However, with all my friends who are taking it are often talking about.  It actually seems a rather fun course.  Of course, there’s a lot of hard work in it like writing and presenting a speech, but I find a strange interest in it.  My friends say that they are the ones in remorse, but I don’t think so.  MUN is very helpful and I’m sure they’ll do well in class.  Why didn’t I think of that and have that kind of confidence in myself when choosing my classes?

Melancholy Days

It’s summer time, isn’t this the time to skip around joyfully and scream “FREEDOM!”?  I miss and don’t miss school.  I’m much more relaxed and having more fun then I would during the school year, however, I feel busy.  I say I’m busy, but at the same time, I feel utterly bored.

My enlightment is when I’m with friends or when I’m hanging out with my sister.  When my sister was still around at home, before she went to college, I was annoyed at her presence.  Now that she’s rarely home, I feel an empty hole in me, loneliness chewing it larger.

My friends are extremely bitter towards they’re younger siblings, calling them annoying brats.  I feel rather jealous of them though, to have someone there to play with, to be looked up to.  My friends’ siblings ask to play, they bother, they ask for help all the time according to my friends.  They feel that they are anything but lucky.  I tell them that they want attention, because that’s how I was with my sister, but they claim they’re siblings just wanted to annoy them.  They also think that I’m the lucky one, to have a mature, older sister.  I guess I am.  She’s there when I need her, correcting my mistakes when I’m doing something wrong, listening to me when I’m down, and other things for me.  However, I want to be the one to be relied on sometimes too.  I want someone to be just there.  With my sister gone most of the time, I feel like an only sibling.  I hope my friends miss their little brothers and sisters when they go to college, rather then cheer, because we, younber siblings, can have feelings too.

However, I’m the youngest in my family; everyone else is much older than me.  I know three of my cousins.  They’re several years older than me, guys, live in China, and speak Chinese and little English.  I’d have a hard time to confide in them-especially with my poor Chinese-even if they were willing to listen to a child’s problems or hang out with me.

Another thing I feel slightly deprived of is, I don’t recall ever holding a baby.  Seeing one, yeah, my friend’s newborn sister and people strolling they’re kids down the sidewalk.  That’s pretty much it.  I realize that I absolutely suck with children.  For a community club I was in for school, we went to a children’s center to play with them.  I knew utterly nothing.  Some of my friends have their siblings and or babysitted before, so they knew exactly how to interact with children.  Me, I have no clue, zip, nada.

I wish I had a younger sibling.  I wish for many things.  At the moment, I wish school would start already, save me from the boredom from doing things I don’t want to do, and save me from the things I don’t want to think.

Summer School

I have summer school this year, it started a week after school ended.  I don’t take normal summer school at the high school though, so unlike other’s I only have class three times a week–Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.  My classes: Algebra II and English (monday-critical reading, tuesday-vocabulary, and wednesday-writing & grammar)

I don’t really need to take these classes, Algebra II is just so I can get ahead next year.  I found out though, we learned the fundamentals of most of the things in Algebra II in Algebra I and Geometry.  The textbook we’re using is the same as school’s (or so I’ve heard).  There used to be a program at my [future] high school, in which I could take Algebra II during the summer and go to the next level at school.  However, it changed, now it’s only for the people who hae a C or lower and need help.

English is moreorless, for my advantage.  Once again, not something I urgently need, but it’s preparing me for the SAT.  It’s only the second week, and I feel like I need the class more and more.  Critical reading, I think I’m doing pretty good; but what we do in class, it isn’t something I’m normally reading.  I wonder if that’s a bad thing.  I know that my vocabulary is very . . . inept (vocabulary word) my sister always tells me that I need to read more.  I tend to pick weird and not as enriching books at the library.  Maybe I should ask my summer school English teacher for recommendations.  My grammar isn’t as great as I thought though.  This entry might be full of grammatical errors, I’m not sure if I can tell anymore.  My writing (the main reason why my parents signed me up for English) seems pretty good.  I’m glad about that, I do want to be an author after all; but what’s an author if my vocabulary is skimpy and my grammar is bad?

Dream a Dream

My dream is to become an author.  I’m only a 14 year old girl though, and I have a long way to go before I fantasize about becoming a famous author.

My teachers often praise me of my creativity, so I guess that somewhat led me onto writing stories.  I currently write stories just for fun, but I dream that maybe they can be published.  However, I start many stories–due to sudden inspiration–but I never finished any.  I finished one, but I recently started extending it, leaving me, once again, with incomplete stories.  I feel that I’m only good with short stories, the kind you would find in English textbooks–at least the ones I had.  Long-lengthed novels are out of my reach.  I might have a good idea, but I can’t add enough meat to it to be over ten pages long.  Maybe I should stick with short stories?